Sergeant Tony's Blog

Uriah the Hittite — Sgt. M. Tony Ludlow blog post for 5/28/2014

Wednesday, May. 28th 2014 6:49 PM

A recent critique of writing declared that articles and books that only feature numbered lists and bullet points is ruining writing. But they seem to be very popular, those lists and bullet points.

Articles with provocative titles and lists — with short sentences and paragraphs — boosts the popularity of such articles. “5 Ways to Buy the Right Car.” “23 Best Stock Market Tips.” “10 Best Exercises to Give You a Beach Body in 3 Weeks.” Even the Bible has a pretty popular list. It could be repackaged for today’s market with: “10 Ways to Please God.” But “The 10 Commandments” seems to have stuck. Lists and bullet points get read. Other things just have too many words.

A few years ago I put together a “think tank” designed to study the growth of USMC Fitness Boot Camp, primarily “why” do people keep coming? I invited 25 boot campers, a cross section and sampling of the 150 people in the program, to participate in a study of the program.

I divided the 25 into 5 groups of 5 and gave them 5 questions to discuss and answer. We met over three successive Saturday mornings in the library of Christ Methodist Day School. I even had breakfast catered! Classy, no?

At the time I was looking to be able to present USMC Fitness Boot Camp as a possible business model for a veteran in another location to run. I was particularly interested in veterans recently discharged from the Marine Corps, Navy SEALs, or even some hardcore Army vets … and even an Air Force vet who might be a good fit. But in order to know what to emphasize to these prospects, I needed to know what was most important to boot campers. So I asked each group to do several things, including to formulate 5 reasons they continued to be in the program.

The results weren’t what I expected. Not by a long shot.

All 5 groups had the same response for their #1 or #2 reason. Without consulting the other groups, they independently came up with something I hadn’t really expected to see at the top of those lists.

Here it is: “Tony remembers my name.”

Wait. What?

What about the workouts themselves? What about the increase in fitness? What about the weight loss? What about the sense of community? What about the improvement of overall health and wellness? What about … ?

Most of those things were found on the list, that’s true, but none of those things were at the top of those 5 lists.

Then I thought about a conversation I was in that seemed to be just the opposite of the things on that list.

I thought about how I wanted to choke someone recently. I thought about how it was the restraining grace of God, the hand of Providence, the work of the Almighty, and the threat of prison that kept me from wrapping my hands around his neck and squeezing until he quit talking.

The guy never shut up. He’s the kind of guy who enters a conversation he isn’t invited to join and immediately interrupts whoever is talking and takes over. He’s the kind of guy who’s loud, and obnoxious, and annoying. He thinks himself to be a good conversationalist because he talks nonstop. But he doesn’t have conversations, he gives lectures, sermons, and campaign speeches. Incessantly. And he does NOT know your name.

He never asks questions, nor does he take an interest in anyone else. He just drones on and on about himself. He’s the negligent neighbor’s barking dog. He’s the car alarm down the street blaring in the middle of the night.

You know guys like this. Or women like this. Sometimes these people are females. It’s not just a guy thing.

This guy talks “crap” constantly. He is often found in sales type jobs, but not exclusively so. He back-slaps and glad-hands everyone. He calls guys “chief,” or “buddy,” or “sport” or something impersonal and sleazy like that because he has no idea what your name is, though you’ve met many times.

I haven’t worked in a corporate setting, or within any kind of organizational institution, in over 10 years. I forget what that environment is like, but I recently got a reminder.

In an essay I wrote some time ago, I shared the acronym “B.S. Neti” as a way to remember concepts from Dale Carnegie’s bestseller, “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” Here it is again if you missed it.

B.S. Neti

1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile. Frowners are downers.
3. Remember that a person’s Name is all important to them.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
6. Make the other person feel Important.

These are time-tested concepts that lead to good relationship building and are the bricks and mortar of good friendship skills.

After my recent reminder of what so many of you must deal with at work, in the office, in the company you work for, at church, or the professional associations you must maintain, I thought I would give you — for amusement and propagation — the 6 steps of “How to Lose Friends and Alienate People.”

1. Being interested in others is a colossal waste of time. After all, you are the most interesting person in the room. No one else is as interesting as you and your life is way more important. Waaaay more. So intrude into conversations you’ve not earned the right to be a part of and haven’t been invited to participate in. Smother others with yourself.

2. Smiling is okay, so long as others are smiling at you. But smiling is usually for weak people. Frown more. Frowning keeps others off balance and on their guard. Others will think you’re in a bad mood and will either avoid you or try to find ways to make you feel better. Either way, it’s all about you.

3. It isn’t necessary to learn the other person’s name while you’re lecturing, moralizing, and pontificating. You know your own name and that’s the only name you, and everyone else, needs to know. Those other people are just happy to know YOUR name!

4. Encourage others to listen to every word you say by completely monopolizing every conversation. Remember, others only want to hear you talk. Ingratiate yourself into every group that you’re even obliquely connected.

5. Talk in terms of what your interests and experiences are. Feel completely free to talk ad infinitum ad nauseum about you, your experiences, your life, your kids, your vacations, your likes and dislikes, your thoughts, your favorite restaurants, movies, music and all the minutiae about YOU, YOU, WONDERFUL YOU!

6. You are the center of the universe! Make sure that others know how important you are. Do this by making sure they know things about you that will put them in their place and make them feel inferior. Make sure they know that you’re more important than they are. Do it with false humility and fake modesty. Give the glory to God, while enumerating the things “He” empowered YOU to do. Hallelujah! Feel free to talk about how “the Lord” has blessed you with money and means, with cars and house(s), with trips and achievements, etc., in order to make others praise the lord because of how He’s blessed you. And feel free to talk loudly too, especially if you’re on a cell phone in a crowded public place. This will give you maximum exposure to others, making you a blessing to them. Show your benevolence and generosity by giving others a chance to hear you talk and marvel at your deeds.

Those who are described above seldom see themselves, even if a mirror is held before them. They’re like King David in the Old Testament. The prophet Nathan told King David a story about a rich man and a poor man and how the rich man, who owned many flocks and herds, took the poor man’s one and only lamb — a lamb that had been raised like a family pet — and slaughtered it, cooked it, and fed it to his house guests. King David was enraged when he heard Nathan’s story, but he failed to recognize that the rich man in the story was the King himself, and that Bathsheba and her husband, Uriah, were the poor man and his one and only little ewe lamb. So, it’s likely that those guilty of the 6 infractions above might not ever see themselves in the description. In fact, they most likely won’t.

When I’m in a large group of people, like at a big party for example, I eavesdrop on small groups to see who the self-absorbed are, and then try to avoid them. The blow-hards all have similar traits, they all sound the same, and they seldom ask any questions. But if they do, they only ask questions designed to help them pigeonhole the others. And if you do manage to get a chance to get in a word edgewise, they won’t listen. They’re only thinking about what they’re going to say next. And they do NOT know your name. And something is always causing them to “nibble at the edge of stale ideas.”

Now back to the original point. Yesterday I needed to take my bicycle to the shop to be repaired. I live near three bike shops, one of which has the best service/technical reputation in the area. Unfortunately, I’d already taken the bike to that shop and they’d not fixed the problem, though I’d taken it to them 3 times and spent a couple hundred dollars.

So, I decided to travel out to Collierville to “Bike World.” But since I’m a died in the wool East Memphian, traveling out of my little “box” takes a near Act of Congress. And Collierville, well, Collierville might as well be Nashville as far as I’m concerned. But Bike World is in Collierville and I’ve used that shop before and had a good experience. But since it’s so far away, I seldom go out there. But I loaded up my bike, and for the first time in about 18 months, took my bike to Collierville’s Bike World. I walked in the shop and the owner looked up and instantly said with a smile and without hesitation, “HEY, TONY! HOW’VE YOU BEEN?”

The other shops near me, even the one I’d used just recently several times and spent a lot of money in, didn’t even remember my name from one visit to the next.

Guess which shop I’ll use more often?

“Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.”

— 30 —

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BOGA FOR ALL TOMORROW!

That’s 1/2 boot camp exercise and 1/2 power yoga.

BOOT CAMP FEE INCREASE!

If you’ve been an active duty boot camper in 2014, your fees aren’t going up. Your fees remain unchanged! All new recruits and all returning former active duty boot campers will be under the new fee structure effective 1 June. So you formerly active and awesome folks come on back NOW and lock in the old rate!

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TODAY’S NUTRITION TALK
by Staff Sergeant Ashley Holloway, Registered Dietitian, LDN

(A Registered Dietitian has a BS in Food Science, followed by a one year internship through an accredited university, and then with the recommendation of the internship program’s supervisor, a national examination is required. After that, an RD must have continuing education units annually in order to remain active and registered. An RD is an expert, not a hobbyist or a “food enthusiast.”)

Do you need to Detox?

Detox diets are touted as a way to flush toxins out of your system. These diets are quite popular, but they are not scientifically proven.

The specifics of detox diets can vary, but usually a period of fasting is then followed by a strict diet of raw vegetables, fruit and fruit juices, and water. Some detox diets also advocate using herbs and other supplements along with colon cleansing through enemas or colonics to further empty the intestines.

You may lose a little bit of weight from a detox diet, but it is usually temporary from a combination of being on a very low calorie diet, losing water weight, and from having empty intestines. Plus, you’re likely to lose weight and then gain it right back when you go off any extreme diet.

There is little evidence that detox diets actually remove toxins from the body. Nor do you need to help your body “detoxify.” Your organs and immune system handle these duties, no matter what you eat. Your kidneys and liver are quite effective at filtering and eliminating most ingested toxins.

Some say that they feel better on a detox diet, but why they temporarily feel better may actually come from the fact that they are avoiding highly processed foods, extra sugar, and fat. These benefits may come at a cost. Detox diets that severely limit protein or that require fasting can result in fatigue, muscle aches, and irritability. Long-term fasting can result in vitamin and mineral deficiencies. Colon cleansing, through enemas and colonics, can cause cramping, bloating, nausea and vomiting and even dehydration can be a concern. And if the diet recommends pills, herbs, or supplements, these items are not backed by the FDA and can interact with different medications and can cause issues on their own.

Finally, keep in mind that fad diets aren’t a good long-term solution. For lasting results, your best bet is to eat a healthy diet based on fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and lean sources of protein.

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MAKE A $&(#&@^#!*% FACE!!!!

INCREASE YOUR WEIGHTS!

YOU GET OUT WHAT YOU PUT IN!

What you get out of the workouts is determined by you.

How much do you work? How much effort you put into trying to do all of the repetitions with proper form and how much weight you’re using will determine what you get out of each workout.

YOU DETERMINE WHETHER YOUR WORKOUT IS HALF-ASS OR KICKASS!

It’s time for you to go up in weights … that’s what I’m thinking!

MAKING A FACE (THE GRIMACE) IS THE POOR MAN’S (OR WOMAN’S) FACELIFT!

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EVERY WEDNESDAY AND THURSDAY ARE T-SHIRT DAYS!

WEAR YOUR RANK INSIGNIA SHIRT, SUB 7 SHIRT, OR OTHER USMC FITNESS BOOT CAMP SHIRT!

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SUB SEVEN CLUB!

Members of the Sub-7 Club are Boot Campers who’ve run the mile in under 7 minutes under my observation and timing.

These are the current members of the Sub Seven Club:

Corporal Lee Chase,
Corporal Chris McLelland,
Staff Sergeant Patrick Moore,
Staff Sergeant Rob Johnston,
Staff Sergeant Andrew Stolnicki,
Gunnery Sergeant Bart Thomas,
Staff Sergeant Dory Sellers,
Gunnery Sergeant Henry Kenworthy,
Master Sergeant John Winford,
First Sergeant Matt Green,
And Sergeant Major Andrew Forsdick.

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VETERAN BOOT CAMPERS!

Are you coming up on promotion? Let me know!

Every Wednesday is our Official BOOT CAMP T-SHIRT DAY! You can wear your rank insignia shirt anytime you‘d like, of course, but always every Wednesday!

The Rank Structure of the Quarterdeck:

Under 6 months is a Private
Six months to 1 year is a Private First Class.

Over 1 year is a Lance Corporal
– Pam Torres – meritoriously promoted 12/2012
– Teresa Reed 2/2012*
– Natalie Mannon 5/2012
– Emma Crystal 5/2012
– Megan Collins 6/2012
– Maria Wyatt 6/2012
– Beth Stengel 2/2012
– Chris Kelley 6/2102
– Susye Clark 7/2012
– Victoria Tigrett 8/2012
– Crystal Bloodworth 8/2012
– Lora Gubanov 8/2012
– Shelia Johnson 8/2012
– Orli Weisser-Pike 9/2012
– Morgan Johnson 10/2012
– ShaWanda Upshaw 10/2012
– Chuck Miller 11/2012
– Diane Gorney 12/2012
– Lexie Johnston 12/201?
– Ashley Summers 2/2014
– Ben Summers 2/2013
– Sam Lee 2/2013
– Louise Biedenharn 2/2013
– Jay Biedenharn 2/2013
– Ragan Washburn 2/2013
– Mary Holland Doan 4/2013
– Kay Barkoh 4/2013
– Melissa Campbell 4/2013

Over 2 years is a Corporal
– Jeremy Harris 1/2009*
– Courtney Phillips 2/2011
– JD Dombroski 4/2011
– Becky Lawler 5/2010*
– Carrie Schule 5/2011
– Bevan Lee 5/2011
– Mary Bauer 6/2011
– Lee Chase 7/2011
– Tait Keller 8/2011
– Heath Anderson 9/2011
– Lindsey Stanfill 9/2011
– Tara Ingram 11/2011
– Rachel Phillips 2/2012
– Jean Maskas 2/2012
– Keith Renard 4/2012
– Alan Compton 4/2012
– Steve Havard 5/2012

Over 3 years is a Sergeant
– Emily Melonas 6/2010
– Keith Renard 6/2009*
– Ashley McClure 7/2010
– Falana Scott 7/2010
– Jenni Harris 8/2010
– Anne Marie Wyatt 8/2010
– Tim Romanow 8/2010
– Paul Bauer 11/2010
– Robin Scott 3/2011
– Chris McLelland 3/2011
– Randal Rhea 4/2011
– Cindy King 4/2011
– Sherri Thompson 4/2011
– Melissa Thompson 5/2011
– Michelle Moss 5/2011

Over 4 years is a Staff Sergeant
– Jonathan Phillips 10/2008*
– Scott Plunkett 10/2008
– Shena Clemons 10/2008
– Teresa Faulk 6/2009
– Sarah Vickers 8/2009
– Robert Hunt 8/2009
– Cameron Mosley 11/2009
– Karen Massey 11/2009
– Cecelia DeLacy 2/2010
– Malinda Miller 3/2010
– Jay Mednikow 3/2010
– Ashley Holloway 4/2010
– Beth Mills 5/2010

Over 5 years is a Gunnery Sergeant
– Rob Johnston 4/2008
– Alan Schaeffer 4/2008
– Buddy Daves 5/2008
– Mike Ryan 5/2006*
– Dory Sellers 6/2006*
– Albo Carruthers 8/2008
– Anne Kenworthy 8/2008
– Patrick Moore 9/2008
– Jessie Flanders 1/2009
– Andrew Stolnicki 1/2009
– Ben Killerlain 1/2009
– Paul Tronsor 3/2009

Over 6 years is a Master Sergeant
– Jeff Lee 1/2006*
– Anne Mead 2/2005*
– Leslie Garey 6/2007
– Beth Rehrig 7/2007
– Matt Prince 8/2007
– Frank Jemison 10/2007
– Patty Dougherty 3/2008
– Oscar Adams 3/2008

Over 7 years is a First Sergeant
– Megan Warr 8/2006
– Rob Norcross 8/2006
– Kay Ryan 10/2006
– Michelle Dunn 3/2007
– George Rose 5/2007
– Henry Kenworthy 5/2007

Over 8 years is a Sergeant Major
– Louis Glazer 3/2005
– Mike Barta 6/2005*
– Anne Emmerth 6/2005*
– Gary Thompson 10/2005
– Scot Bearup 10/2005
– Kay Shelton 1/2006
– Leesa Jensen 5/2006

Over 9 years is a Warrant Officer 1
– Andrew Forsdick 9/2004
– Melissa Moore 2/2005
– Matt Green 5/2005

Over 10 years is a Chief Warrant Officer 2
– Buddy Flinn 7/2003
– Amy Singer 9/2003
– David Townsend 1/2004
– Hank Brown 3/2004

Over 11 years is a Chief Warrant Officer 3
– Pat McGhee 1/2003
– John Whittemore 1/2003
– Peter Pettit 5/2003

Battalion Executive Officer
Major Richard Bourland, 9/2003

* broken time

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ARE WE FACEBOOK FRIENDS?

We should be!

HAVE YOU “LIKED” THE USMC FITNESS BOOT CAMP FACEBOOK PAGE?

You should totally do that!

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BOOT CAMP DISCOUNT

If you set up an automatic payment at your bank (Boot Camp mailing address is 4888 Southern, Memphis 38117) you can subtract $10 off your fee! That’s right, instead of $75, you can pay $65!

(This is not an automatic bank draft that I set up with a voided check. This an automatic payment that you yourself set up.)

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USMC FITNESS BOOT CAMP CLASSES – NEW STUFF!

0530 Monday through Friday
(First and second Tuesday of the month are M-16 Workouts at CUMC. Third and fourth Tuesdays are Mt. Fuji Workouts at the U of M)

0645 M-F Inside the blue gym until April.

5:45 PM: Monday through Thursday, 5:30 on Friday.

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BOOT CAMP DISCOUNTS AND FACEBOOK EXPERIMENT!

First of all, find me on Facebook and make me your friend. (Also, be sure to “like” USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP on Facebook.)

Here’s how the discount works!

It’s simple: make a Facebook status update and get a discount!

For every status update that you make that references:
“USMC Fitness Boot Camp,”
“Sgt. Tony’s Boot Camp,”
“Tony’s Boot Camp,”
or something similar, (there are fake boot camps out there) you can take $2.50 off your next reenlistment fee for each update!

You can take up to $20 off for any given month!

Your status update has to be a specific reference to USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP or to me specifically by name.

BE SURE TO TAG ME!

You can do the same thing by “checking in” at USMC Fitness Boot Camp either by using Facebook “places,” Foursquare, or any of the other “check in” apps that show up on your Facebook News Feed.

So log on and start getting your discounts now!

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Q. How can I get up in the morning on a consistent basis?A. Contrary to what many think, I am NOT a morning person. I have to be “dynamited” out of the bed! Here are some tips to help you get going in the morning:1. Use two alarm clocks. I have a snooze alarm that starts going off several minutes before I intend to get up. Then I have a “Last Call” alarm clock that is located across the room. This alarm clock is set to go off when I MUST get up.2. Once the last call alarm goes off, the bed becomes OFF LIMITS! Get moving!3. Get out of bed, turn off the alarm clock, and start turning on lights all through the house. Turn the TV on!
4. Lay out your clothes the night before. Don’t go wandering around the house in the morning trying to find your left shoe and your favorite shorts. So, have things ready the night before.

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What would you do if money was not an issue, fear was not a factor, and failure was not an option?

To your optimum health and fitness!

SEE YOU ON THE QUARTERDECK!

Tony

Sergeant Major Tony Ludlow

USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP, Commanding
Mailing address: 4888 Southern Ave., Memphis, TN 38117
Cell Phone: 901-644-0145

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