When my kids were little, like 10 years old or so, they would put dirty dishes in the sink and scamper off to play or terrorize their father.
Leaving the dishes in the sink was unsatisfactory.
I tried several different ways to get them to take responsibility for their messes. I yelled. I threatened. I cajoled. Finally I stumbled on a method that actually worked. Well, after a couple of times.
One Saturday afternoon I went into the kitchen and found the sink full of dirty dishes: cereal bowls, glasses, saucers, forks and spoons. The usual stuff kids mess up.
I called the three of them into the kitchen and gathered them around the sink. Then I asked this question:
“You put those dishes in the sink without rinsing them off and putting them in the dishwasher, right? Exactly who did you think was going to do that?”
“OK, let me make it easier for you. Tell me the name of the person you thought was going to clean your mess.”
“OK, here’s the deal. The next time you make a mess and start to walk away, STOP! Then ask yourself this one simple question: ‘What is the name of the person responsible for cleaning my mess?’ The answer is always YOUR NAME! YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE!”
Teaching personal responsibility to a child is a challenging thing for a parent. Teaching personal responsibility to an adult is even harder.
So who is ultimately responsible for:
your self esteem,
your peace of mind,
Who is responsible?
You are 100% responsible.
But I hear people whine and complain about their lives, their loves, their lack of this or that, how life continues to screw them daily, how they’d be more than they are if only X, Y, and Z had happened. Excuses and blame.
I know people who moan about being fat, but do nothing to lose weight. I know a woman who’s been complaining about not finishing her degree for the past 20 years, but has never registered for a class leading toward a degree. I know people who bounce from one relationship to another looking for “happiness,” expecting the next guy or the next woman to make THEM happy, but never look inward, never work on themselves, and never wonder how much fun they are to be with. I know people who explain the nearly constant chaos and drama in their lives as someone else’s fault. I know people who don’t know why they’re stuck in one dead-end job after another, but never think about developing themselves as a resource for advancement. Ad infinitum. Ad nauseum.
I don’t know which is least understood by those knuckleheads, personal responsibility or cause and effect.
The universe rewards action! Not excuses!
Get a dry erase marker and write in big letters on your bathroom mirror:
“I AM 100% RESPONSIBLE FOR MY LIFE!”
Several years ago I was on Match.com. (You heard me. Deal with it.) It was a fairly underwhelming experience. I read profiles of ladies that were such miserable marketing tools for their hopes for romance. The profiles were full of negativity, cynicism, and bitterness. “I’m looking for a man who won’t lie to me and be such a jerk, like my ex was.” Stuff like that.
Well, after a while I thought I’d try to help these ladies out. So I took it upon myself to contact these negative Nellies and gently suggest that they might want to rewrite their profiles from a more positive and upbeat perspective. And I PROMISE I was nice and kind and warm and sympathetically persuasive. I promise!
But you would NOT believe the response I got! These women were NOT interested in ANY advice I had to give. They got angry by the mere suggestion that there was anything wrong with their profiles and there was NOTHING wrong with the way they presented themselves, thank you very much. “What makes YOU such an authority anyway?” they said.
“Oh, I don’t know. I’m a guy, maybe? And you wrote the profile for guys like me to read,” I said to myself, but never said to them.
My guess is that those women aren’t in successful relationships today. When you don’t change yourself, or your behavior, or the way you process the world, or the way you engage the world, or the way that you present yourself to the world, nothing changes. You’ll just keep getting the same results.
Same cause, same effect.
Confucius said, “By three methods we may learn wisdom: first, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third, by experience, which is the most bitter.”
MyFitnessPal app for the iPhone!
If keeping track of your calories is boring (it is) and time consuming (it is) and a pain (it is), then you can follow a prescribed plan like Take Shape for Life, Jenny Craig, or any of the other meal replacement programs that do the thinking and calorie counting for you. I used Take Shape for Life two years ago and it works!
Let me recommend an app for your smart phone that’s awesome. “MyFitnessPal” will take the dull and tediousness out of tracking your calories. It’s EASY, uses a bar code scanner that will automatically calculate and add your calories, has an extensive database of food options to choose from, and gives you other kinds of ways to help you achieve your goals.
SPRING HALF MARATHON TRAINING BEGINS SATURDAY!
Are you thinking about it, but not sure that you can do it?
This will be my 17th half marathon training session to lead! I’ve trained hundreds of people to run their first half marathon! So newbies and veterans alike are welcome!
The prerequisites to start the training are simple: if you can cover 3 miles in 36 minutes or less by Jan. 28th, you’re good to go! The cost is cheap and the rewards are HUGE! Boot Campers only pay $75 for the 12 Week Course. (Non-Boot Campers: $125)
If you’re not sure, show up on Saturday and give it a shot. No charge for the first training run!
YOU CAN DO THIS!!! Come on out and give it a try!
Training begins at 7am this Saturday, January 28. We’ll meet in front of the Visitor’s Center at Shelby Farms.
Join the Buffalo Runners of USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP!
There are at least five half marathons in April! There is one in Nashville, Louisville, St. Louis, Oklahoma City, and a new one here in Memphis – Dash for Dads Half Marathon and 5K are on April 28th – www.s2fevents.com!
HELP ME, HELP YOU!!
USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP Facebook Page Needs You!
If you’ve not “liked” the page, do so at once!! I’ve been challenged by a business buddy to get 1000 “likes” by the end of the month! Like it! Do it now!!
… would you be so kind as to click on the right side of the page and click on the “Recommendations from friends” and write a recommendation?
You can take $5 off your next enlistment if you write a recommendation of 3 sentences or more! But ONLY if you really mean it. No phony testimonials!
BOGA tomorrow morning at 5:30am
PHYSICAL FITNESS TEST: Tuesday, January 31 at 5:30am. It’ll consist of max push ups in two minutes, max sit ups in two minutes, and a timed 1.5 mile run/jog/walk. This will be fun! I promise!!
Start2Finish Event Management is currently seeking part time employees to work race day events. Job duties could include but not limited to; working registration, race timing, course coning, setting up/manning water stops, loading and unloading trucks, parking vehicles and much more. Interested candidates please contact Daniel Shaffer at firstname.lastname@example.org
I GOTTA GUY!!! (And a GAL)
I like to share the names of people I do business with and trust so that if you need services that they offer you’ll know someone trustworthy to contact.
1. Margaret Caffey.
Thinking about a trip to Walt Disney World, Universal to see Harry Potter, or maybe a Disney Cruise – Margaret Caffey has turned her passion for all things Disney into a career and is now a travel agent with MEI & Mouse Fan Travel. For all your Disney travel planning or just to ask a question call Margaret at 901-828-6354. Also please take a second to ‘like’ her Facebook page at Mouse Fan Margaret. (https://www.facebook.com/login/setashome.php?ref=login#!/pages/Mouse-Fan-Margaret/130316623686981).
PS – I hear she knows a lot about all the cruise lines too! Margret is MY personal Disney trip planner! No one, and I mean NO ONE, knows more about Disney than Mags!
2. Dr John Whittemore was voted Best Family Dentist in Memphis Parent Magazine’s most recent survey.
Also voted Hot List Cosmetic Dentist in the Memphis Flyer and listed among Top Dentists in Memphis Magazine every year. If you want personalized, caring general or cosmetic dentistry on a whole other level than you’ve experienced before, call John’s office to make an appointment. (901)-754-0540.
John is also selling his 4BR/3BA house on Audubon Drive.
3. Richard Bourland – “Your Boot Camp Handyman” – Home Improvement, Carpentry, Custom Bunk Beds and other Woodworking Services, email@example.com, 901.826-6695. www.midsouthbunkbeds.com
You can see a much longer and detailed list of people I refer on the USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP website blog page. Once on the blog page use the search window, keyword “Buddy,” and it’ll take you to that page.
If you drop my name, you might get a discount. But for sure you’ll get their sympathy and prayers!
If you’d like to be listed here in “I GOTTA GUY” just let me know!
WIND CHILL AND INCLEMENT WEATHER POLICY
Anytime the wind-chill drops below 30 – in the 38117 zip code! — we’ll go inside. Get the Weather.com app for your phone and check to see what the temperature “feels like.” That’s the number we’ll use. What it FEELS LIKE!
The 0645 class is inside from now until March.
Check with weather.com or The Weather Channel. I’ll post it on my Facebook page and the Boot Camp website Blog page (http://usmcfitnessbootcamp.com/blog/) if there’s a question. And if you’re not sure, you can text me at 901-644-0145.
What about inclement weather days?
We’ll follow the Memphis City Schools decision. If they close, we’ll stand-down. If they close in the morning but the streets are clear and good to go by the afternoon, the evening class will meet. I’ll post that status on Facebook and the Boot Camp Blog page.
I’ve got a few prime hours open during the week if you know someone looking for a trainer. I use the facilities at Christ Methodist and the hourly rates are standard for Memphis. Over-all fitness training, boot camp style workouts, strength training, sports specific conditioning and agility (tennis, soccer, basketball, etc.)
TonyLudlow@aol.com or 901-644-0145
THE 0645 CLASS
The 0645 Class is inside for their winter hibernation until March 2012 We’ll use the “blue gym” aka “the pizza gym!”
NEW BOOT CAMP DISCOUNT
If you set up an automatic payment at your bank (Boot Camp mailing address is 4888 Southern, Memphis 38117) you can subtract $10 off your fee! That’s right, instead of $75, you can pay $65!
USMC FITNESS BOOT CAMP CLASSES
0530 Monday through Friday
5:45 PM: Monday and Wednesday, and 5:30 PM on Friday.
THE TUESDAY AND THURSDAY EVENING CLASSES ARE ON HIATUS UNTIL FEB 2012
BOOT CAMP DISCOUNTS!
The monthly fee of $75 can be discounted to $55!
DID YOU HEAR THAT?
THE MONTHLY FEE OF $75 CAN BE DISCOUNTED TO $55!
Here’s how …
Make a Facebook status update and get a discount!
For every status update that you make that references:
“USMC Fitness Boot Camp,”
“Sgt. Tony’s Boot Camp,”
“Tony’s Boot Camp,”
or something similar, you can take $2.50 off your reenlistment fee for each update, up to $20 off for any given month! You can go from $75 to $55 a month!!
Your status update has to be a SPECIFIC reference to USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP or to me specifically by n
ame. (There are fake boot camps out there!!)
You can also use “Places” on Facebook or Foursquare linked to your Facebook account to “check in” and you’ll get the same discount!
Use your own wording and personality, just include the specifics.
So log on and get started today!
UNEMPLOYED PERSON’S DISCOUNT
If you’ve been a Boot Camper in the past and you are currently unemployed, you can get a special discount. Email me for the details. Seriously! Email me! NOW! And don’t be embarrassed. I will make you an offer that you can’t refuse. Seriously.
LAW ENFORCEMENT AND FIRE DEPARTMENT DISCOUNTS
Police Officers, Sheriff’s Deputies, and Memphis Firefighters qualify for a special discount! It’s the least I can do to ensure that our law enforcement officers and firefighters are fit for their job!! Pass the word!
WANT TO LOSE 10 to 15 POUNDS BY THE END OF FEBRUARY?
Take Shape For Life is the BEST weight loss program I know of. If you’d like to lose weight talk to me. This is the program I used to lose the almost 30 pounds I gained after knee surgery. Let me help you!
You can also go to www.combatchallenge.tsfl.com/
TUESDAY & THURSDAY EVENING CLASS
The Tuesday and Thursday evening classes are standing down until March. So no Tues/Thurs evening classes until then.
A calendar has been added to the official USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP website.
For you visual learners, you’ll find this an easy way to glance at the week or month and see where the workouts will be, if there’s a venue change.
“The only thing that scares me is a succession of ordinary days.”
Make your days extraordinary!
Sergeant Major Tony Ludlow
USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP, Commanding
4888 Southern Ave.
Memphis, TN 38117