MALINGERING — 9/6/07
Malingering = intransitive verb. ma·lin·gered, ma·lin·ger·ing, ma·lin·gers
To feign illness or other incapacity in order to avoid duty or work.
Dear Battalion,
Please excuse Tony from Boot Camp while he recovers from … uh … the bubonic plague, I mean … ah … er … the Ebola virus, yeah, that’s it … the Ebola virus. Which he got while he was … in … ah … Africa … that’s right, he was in Africa last week … umm uh … running with Kenyans … yeah, that’s the ticket … he was in Africa running with KENYANS! So, excuse him from Boot Camp this week. He will return as soon as his witch doctor says it’s OK and he does not feel like doo doo.
Sincerely,
Tony’s mom
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My Dear Friends,
I want to thank you so very much for your prayers, emails, phone calls, and the care packages left at my door. God bless you!
This acute bronchial infection, which I must have surely picked up from one of YOU, literally had me on my back for 5 days straight. I don’t remember ever feeling so ill. But I have turned a corner and am feeling better.
Let me apologize to those of you who’ve been inconvenienced in any way, have shown up for a class and had to improvise, or went to the Fox & Hound on Tuesday looking for a party. Gomenasai.
Let me especially offer my heartfelt thanks to Richard Bourland, Margaret Caffey, David Caffey, David Townsend, Scot Bearup, Teri Trotter, Kevin Jenks, and Teri Hirt for stepping up and assuming my responsibilities, going above and beyond the call, and/or doing my job and keeping me out of the poor house. You guys are amazing and wonderful people with tender hearts and a servant’s spirit and I am in your debt. Thank you so very very much.
To all of you awesome Boot Campers, let me tell you how eager I am to return to you! I miss you guys! You’re not just members of an exercise class to me. You’re members of a special and wonderful group! You’re my dysfunctional family and the loss of your daily fellowship has only added to my misery.
For a change, I’m going to heed the orders and advice of my professional medical caregivers, as well as several bossy Boot Campers, and lay low for the remainder of the week.
Half Marathoners: Please meet with David Caffey on Saturday at 8 AM at the U of M in front of the parking garage (Mt. Fuji) on Zach Curlin next to the track and field.
Triathletes: do a 16 mile bike and 3 mile run at the U of M: 10 laps on the bike followed by one mile on the track, one trip up and down Mt. Fuji, and then a final mile on the track. Work on making the transition from bike to run as fast as you can.
I genuinely apologize for being sick and worthless. But at last I finally know what it’s like to be in the Air Force!! (Sorry, Les!)
Again, thank you for your brotherly care and concern for me. I look forward to seeing you, and abusing you, ASAP!
Yours sincerely,
Tony
Sergeant Major Tony Ludlow
USMC Fitness BOOT CAMP, Commanding
4888 Southern Cove
Memphis, TN 38117
901-644-0145
www.usmcfitnessbootcamp.com
http://shaklee.net/tonyludlow/main
